


The Man Who Sold The World

by TheNameless15



Category: Ashes to Ashes (UK TV), Life on Mars & Related Fandoms, Life on Mars (UK), The Boys (TV 2019)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-18 00:15:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29109153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheNameless15/pseuds/TheNameless15
Summary: Only a couple of months after the mysterious disappearance and death of Sam Tyler and his girlfriend Annie Cartwright, the new Fenchurch CID gets a temporary DI.Suitable for all audiences bar young children, but if you don't want spoilers from The Boys don't bother.





	The Man Who Sold The World

"What was that plan again?"

"Oh well..."

Billy lifted his index finger from the trigger, and everything went white. He waited. And waited.

This certainly didn't feel like hell. But it didn't seem like heaven either. 

Billy looked down: he was wearing a nondescript pair of pyjamas, and he appeared to be in some sort of bed. He tried to sit up but his limbs decided it was best to ignore the command his brain had just sent him. Billy felt a little tug on his arm, and he groggily looked to the left- some kind of tube, a saline drip by the looks of it. 

So he was alive? Which meant that Homelander had decided to save him. Which meant that Billy needed to get the fuck out of here, now. 

"Oh, so yer up at last, yer lazy sod. Raymondo over here's dying, he's not been down the pub all day." A thickset man with curly hair, presumably "Raymondo", chuckled and took a puff of his Woodbine. 

"Would one of you wankers mind telling me where the fuck I am?" snarled Billy with less venom than was usual for him, although he had just blown himself up. "The bomb, Homelander, Stillwell what the fuck happened?"

"The bomb? What are you on about yer prancing fairy. You nearly got made into strawberry jam by the milkman driving his cart a few hundred yards from the station. Bloody hell, Ray, I thought Sam was a useless bugger but even he knew how to cross a road without the lollypop lady." 

"D-DI?" 

"Yes, Detective Inspector. They've posted you up from across the water, god knows why some cockney is a bobby over in the land of the free, but you're here until we find someone permanent. If you're quite finished laying about like a lovesick schoolgirl, we have work to do down at the bar. Luigi's Trattoria, opposite Fenchurch East station, bring yer coat and don't eat the spaghetti. Coming Ray?"

"On me way guv. I'll see you around Boss." Ray nodded to Billy, sensing that this was a man after his own heart, although he doubted that any Southerner could possibly keep up with either of them when it came to getting pissed. 

"Yeah, catch ya later pal." Billy frowned and shook his head. So he was in London. Why on earth would Vought bring him here? Where were the rest of the lads? Where, come to think of it, was Homelander? Why did these northerners think he was a copper? Was this some sort of prank, or another of Homelander's lunatic power trips? It was certainly possible, the mad cunt had just murdered his girlfriend in front of her son for fuck's sake. Billy shook his head, his instincts kicking in. Either way, he wasn't going to get back to New York without first getting out of this bed.

"I'll just get this tube out of you love. We had to give you some fluids, you were out for quite a while you know. You take care now!" Smiled the sister, gently removing the drip an helping Billy out of bed. "There's clothes for you over on that chair. D'you need a cab?"

"Er, nah. I'm alright thanks, I-I'll walk." Billy had to get out of the city as quickly as possible: he hadn't been to London in years and his mates from his old days were generally in three locations: Helmand, Wormwood Scrubs and the cemetery. 

"Sorry luv" Billy brushed past a nurse, turning back to apologise. It wasn't until he'd walked twenty yards towards the entrance of the hospital that he recognised who it was. His Aunt Claire. It must have been.

Billy couldn't go back now, he had to get out of here. His brain was playing tricks on him. Aunt Claire had died of breast cancer. In 1993.


End file.
